This is what would go through my mind (pre-pregnancy) the entire time someone would go on, and on, and on, and on, about their kid(s) to me in a conversation. Three minutes about them yapping about their kid's sleep schedule (well, she naps for two hours, well not always two hours, sometimes it's less if she slept a lot the night before and sometimes she skips her nap if we are too busy that day and then she is up alll night and it is a nightmare!), felt like an absolute eternity. Seriously. I actually had apprehension about these conversations. For instance, if I was at work, the second someone would mention their kid's name in a convo, my brain automatically started thinking of ways to get out of there, and quick.
"Oh, I'd love to hear how this story about Johnny's dentist appointment ends, but I got to go pick up my kids from Music!"
"But your kids are at lunch right now..."
"Uh, I mean, I got to go make these copies for the afternoon!!"
Actually I would never really use the excuses I made up in my head, because I'd be too afraid they would think I was rude. So I just listened. And suffered.
There is really nothing more boring to a person without kids than listening to someone talk about their kid. When you don't have kids, everything that person is telling you has absolutely no meaning or relevance. You can't relate, you can't contribute, you can't offer advice...you can just stand there and nod your head, acting interested when really you would rather be doing dishes and folding laundry over listening to their ramblings.
Justin and I knew that once we had a baby, we were vulnerable to falling into this trap. The "bore all the people who don't have kids with constant chatter about our kid" trap. We remind ourselves to keep the kid talk out of conversations with people who don't have kids. We don't want to subject them to the mindless head nodding and fake smiling we had to do for all those years. Even with other parents, we try to keep the kid talk to a minimum.
Besides, I have a blog now to talk allll I want about having a kid. All moms should blog for this very reason. To save the sanity of the rest of the people in the world who can't relate to our stories about leaky diapers, the eight different formulas we've tried, and the story about how the baby loved the pacifier, but now he doesn't, but now he loves it again.
If you ever find yourself on the very boring end of a conversation with me, feel free to say, "Christie, go blog about it." I promise, I will not take offense.
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"A mother is a person who seeing there are only four pieces of pie for five people, promptly announces she never did care for pie." ~Tenneva Jordan
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